Yes, you just read that title from somebody who has been raving about being fit and healthy.
Read it again.
It’s really there. And let me say it again.
You should really stop trying to lose weight.
Because you’ll regret it.
And it never feels good.
Curious? Read on.
The Obsession About Weight Loss
We are all stuck in this world where skinny is in.
How many times have you scrolled down your social media feed and have seen at least 1 photo of a bikini-clad girl?
What about some washboard abs?
Truth is, if you’re following me, you might have seen some of my photos too.
And as early as now, I want to apologize if it has made you feel anything negative. That wasn’t my goal.
See, I built this website to empower the trans man, or trans woman or basically anybody reading this that getting the body you’ve always wanted is never a bad thing.
That getting the body you want is not impossible to get.
But at the same time, let me tell you something else too…
Who Is The Trans Lifter?
You think you already know me. Heck, people are associating me now with anything related to the gym.
But the truth is, I wasn’t always like this.
A few years ago, we had to prepare for a wedding.
I haven’t started medically transitioning yet and mind you, I haven’t even come out either.
Being part of the entourage, naturally, I had to be in a dress for the wedding
The wedding was set in about 2 months and during this time, I had already been doing bouts of a cardio program and wanted to get abs.
If I remember correctly, I weighed 110 lbs. But because of the wedding, I wanted to go lower.
So, aside from overdoing exercise and adding more cardio and crunches on a daily basis, I also started to limit what I ate… to the point where I was only eating 1 wheat bread sandwich per day.
I did this for 2 months up until the morning of the wedding.
Anything over that wheat bread sandwich, I’d feel guilty and do even more cardio.
Was I anorexic? I don’t know. Maybe.
But hey, I was able to wear the dress… with clavicles looking like they could hold water and bones sticking out that they can kill you.
In all fairness, I never got to the point of being so emaciated that I looked sick. That’s why people might not have noticed. And I don’t blame them because this was all on me.
Weight Versus Fat
Yes, you know where this is going.
People get it wrong all the time that’s why there is a confusion.
When you lose fat, you lose weight.
But when you lose weight, it doesn’t always mean you lost fat.
How do you define “bodyweight”? Bodyweight is everything: your skin, organs, bones, muscle, water, blood and everything else sitting there right now reading this.
Fat, on the other hand, is a naturally occurring substance in animal bodies normally deposited around the skin or organs. Fat is a part of our body.
While preparing for the wedding, I didn’t have the common sense to research about how these two things differed.
All I knew, and what most articles say anyway, is I had to exercise and eat less. I definitely missed out on the articles that actually taught what to do like perhaps the Fat Loss 101 series.
I just wanted to lose weight. The hell I cared about body fat, overtraining, cortisol, water retention etc. I want that weighing scale needle to drop down to 90lbs. I wanted to lose weight to fit into my dress.
And I did drop to 90 pounds. But felt like sh*t with my body rejecting the food I was eating via the back end.
Why You Should Stop Trying To Lose Weight
Weight loss is not caring about what you lose: whether it be fat, muscle, water, maybe even an organ in the process.
You don’t care about anything except seeing the numbers drop on the scale.
So you stop eating or start skipping meals, avoid carbs and do low carb diets paired with intermittent fasting, do excessive cardio, do multiple exercise sessions in a day without pairing it with good nutrition.
Of course, the weighing scale will go down. Congratulations!
Skipping carbs will make you lose water. That’s the 2lbs you lost today.
You barely drank water too. That’s another 3lbs from yesterday.
Boom. You just lost 5 lbs in 2 days. Amazing right? Nope.
Weight loss is just that. Your body is using up everything else in your body for energy because you don’t eat anything. Your skin is becoming dehydrated because you think too much water makes you look bloated.
Always feeling cold in your feet and hands because your metabolism is a wreck. Aching joints, people asking if you are sick… who wants that?
See, fat loss is entirely different from that. Fat loss is losing fat while preserving the integrity of your muscle tissue, improving the function of your organs and improving the overall quality of your life.
Fat loss is what looks good on anybody. It’s those transformation photos that you see where people who were heavy before now have visible abs. Where a mom of 4 now has the booty of teenager. That’s fat loss for you.
I think you’re already starting to understand why losing weight is bad… and why losing fat should be your goal instead.
But if you haven’t, let me give you a clearer idea with this list instead.
1. It does not look good
Ever had that feeling when you bust your ass in the gym to get all buffed up and you see a friend and he or she tells you that you look thin matched with that look of judgement on their face?
Especially with the way things are now, people are even more quick to assume that you are using drugs when you lose weight.
I understand that some people do lose 40-50 pounds in a few months or an entire year and that is something to be proud of. It’s not easy and congratulations for doing that.
And it looks good especially if you’ve also put on a bit of muscle or have started sculpting your body. That looks good on anybody.
But when you see somebody who lost 20lbs in 3 weeks, complete with sunken cheeks, bones sticking out with visible ribs as a bonus, let me ask you. Does that look good?
When you start to look like a hanger for your shirt, does that look good?
When people start asking you if you got sick, does that looks good?
I didn’t think so.
If you want to lose the flab and actually be more confident with your body, aim to lose fat. Eat in a caloric deficit and introduce exercise to maintain your muscle or at the very least, your strength.
2. Nope, not gonna get your ripped or sexy.
Do you know what’s the next favorite word of fitness people are aside from the word “gym”?
It’s the word “eat”. You’ll see a whole slew of videos of these fitness girls and guys doing grocery shopping, calorie challenges, cheat meals, full day of eating.. the list just goes on.
But you will never see any of them advocate not eating.
And here you are wondering why they are so ripped or sexy or why they abs even if they eat so much, like this guy who eats at least 4000 calories of junk food every night.
Same answer. They eat. And they never stop eating.
I’ll make this simple: starving yourself will not get you abs.
Believe me, I didn’t see my abs when the wedding happened even if I was barely eating anything.
Instead, I saw my abs eating all the stuff I enjoy in just 14 weeks and counting. You’ve seen it.
3. It’s unhealthy
Did you know that fat is actually responsible for regulating hormonal processes in your body?
Aside from that, it regulates body temperature, absorbs some nutrients, provides energy and even protects your organ. Yes, fat can be and actually is a shock absorber.
Also according to this journal, there are certain fats needed by your body that it cannot produce on its own like triglycerides, cholesterol and other EFAs (Essential Fatty Acids).
These fats actually help protein and carbs do their job. They act as catalysts for chemical reactions that involve growth, repair, immunity and even reproduction.
When you starve yourself, your body turns to everything else in your body to sustain natural biological processes.
When it runs out of fats (and I’m talking about both stored fat and free-roaming fat), how then can your body function normally?
You start to feel sick and weak. And then people notice you actually look sick. Eventually, you will get sick.
4. Your effort will all go to waste
So you found the perfect outfit and now you have to fit into it. Great!
Enroll in a gym, eat like a bird – perfect, right? Nope.
Sure, at first you will see changes. Muscles start to take shape and you feel great. You didn’t waste money on the membership!
And then you lose motivation, your lifts go blah, and on some days you don’t even want to go to the gym.
But you continue to push. Maybe it’s just a bad day.
And then it happens again, an endless cycle. The worst part hasn’t even come yet.
You finally fit into that outfit but you feel like crap. Your face is sunken, you look like a dry piece of leather.
So where did all the gym time go? Nowhere. You weigh less, yes. But you’re also weaker, your immune system almost at zero and now you can say that you wasted money on the gym membership.
5. You will feel like sh*t
I’m not even kidding.
When people try to lose weight, they avoid eating almost everything….and try to do every exercise written on the book.
See, your body’s main source of energy are carbohydrates. But you’re not eating. So once the carbs are burned, your body turns towards fat.
But again you’re not eating, right?
Your body burns out all the fat. The scale drops and you feel happy because you look thin.
Did you enjoy how that felt? How lazy you felt on some days?
How tired you were? What about insomnia? The gurgling tummy in the middle of the night?
That’s right. Your body is now desperately trying to reach out to you in a panic because you are starving it. Your body’s last resort is burning through your muscles. And then your organs.. well, you know where this is going.
This entire time, while you think you look good in that XS shirt or dress, your body is about to wage WWIII on you by eating you up. Literally. Who wins? It’s up to you.